Posted tagged ‘Swine Flu’

Ten Signs That You Need To Change Something In Your Life

December 10, 2009

1.  You wake up wishing you had a very mild case of swine flu.

2.  Despite the two cups of tea, your energy doesn’t kick in till you notice your (old) dog pooping on the carpet.

3.  After the clean-up, you do speed yoga, convincing yourself that it’s on the frontier between relaxation techniques and aerobics.

4.  Your subway ride (only three stops on the express) is the most restful time of your day. (It somehow beats out the speed yoga.)

5.  You re-read vampire novels as you walk from the subway to your office.  You are more concerned about being seen by a co-worker than being hit by a car.

6.  As you get your first cup of work tea, you can’t help thinking that even a mild case might be okay.

7.  After your fourth cup, you are tense enough that, when you get a call from your apartment building, your first thought is that your (old) dog has died.  You know that doesn’t make sense—(would the corpse smell already?)  And yet you can’t help picturing fur leaking out from under your door.  (Yech.)

8.  You are too busy to check Robert Pattinson news even just one time.

9.  Though when someone gives you (for Christmas) a Robert Pattinson calendar, it really makes your day.

10.  You take the local home, happy for the extra stops.

Ten Reasons To Be Thankful In 2009

November 25, 2009

1.  That Robert Pattinson was not in fact hit by a taxi fleeing fans in New York;

2.  and that he exists.

3.  That Lehman Brothers could only fall once;

4.  and that it didn’t happen this year.

5.  That our President (thank God!) has not been the subject of violent attack, despite all the crazy talk.

6.  That we still have a banking system, despite all the crazy talk.

7.  That Captain Sully Sullenberger did not allow his plane to crash into midtown Manhattan, even if the automatic pilot system supposedly could have landed the plane on its own.  (I don’t believe that.)

8.  That Levi Johnston is not our son-in-law.

9.  That Swine Flu has not mutated into a life-threatening epidemic like the 1917 Spanish Flu.

10.  Speaking of the 1917 Spanish Flu, that Edward Cullen didn’t  survive it.   Or did survive it.  Or did whatever he was supposed to have done.

Enjoy your thanks-giving.

And, as always, thank you all for reading.

(If you get a chance, please check out 1 Mississippi by Karin Gustafson at Amazon or on ManicDDaily home page.)