Archive for the ‘elephants’ category

What’s Up With Robert Pattinson? Cartoons? Elephants? Is It All Just Coincidence? Hmmm…..

February 2, 2010

Rob Pattinson With Beard

Every once in a while, one is lucky enough to have confirmation that one really does exist in the world, and that, despite all evidence to the contrary, the little pebbles of one’s actions create ripples that are more extensive than one could ever have projected.

The confirmation of my particular ripple effect has come in the convergence of two extremely newsworthy events:

1.  Robert Pattinson is the subject of a new biography written in cartoon form for Fame magazine, and

2.  Robert Pattinson is  slated to star in the film Water For Elephants to be directed by Sean Penn and supposedly to be shot in upstate New York this summer.

Ahem.

I humbly submit that this blog has long combined writing about Robert Pattinson with

(i)  cartoonish depictions of same;

Rob Pattinson With Yankees' Cap

(ii)  elephants,

Vampire Elephant Contemplating New Moon

and (iii)  a dash of upstate New York (also with a couple of elephants).

A Couple of Elephants in the Catskills

The coincidences just mount up!

Coincidences?  Hmmm…..

Further investigation may be required.

Further Investigation

Rob–if, in fact. you are reading this, give me a call!

For more Pattinson, check out the Robert Pattinson category on the home page of this blog;  for more elephants, check out the elephant category.  And, for even more elephants, check out 1 Mississippi by Karin Gustafson on Amazon.com

Eyes Wide Shut – A Concert

January 31, 2010

Listening To Music

What a wonderful thing it is to close one eyes and listen to music.  This was made very clear to me this afternoon as I attended a friend’s choral concert in which truly sublime music (Brahms and a combination of folk songs and spirituals from Israel, Japan, the United States and England) was sung sublimely.

There is something innately thrilling about listening to live voices raised in song.  I  have to confess though, that because of my ever-wandering and little-disciplined mind, it is sometimes difficult for me to give myself over to it, to simply listen, without doing more (or rather something else) at the same time.  I am habituated to a certain narrative flow, the storyline of thoughts, worries, busy-ness, which is hard to turn off.

At this concert, however, I was blessed by the company, in the next aisle, of a woman in older middle age, with a pale braid in a loop that stuck out at the back.  She came in late, with several large, full, paper bags, a small black backpack and a heavy coat, which she took off, despite the chill, and laid across the empty seats in front of me.

I have to say that I was a bit suspicious of the woman the moment the coat came off, because she was pretty clearly braless under her grey jump suit.  This, perhaps unfairly, combined with the bags made me wonder for a moment whether she wasn’t homeless, except that the admission for the concert seemed a bit high for someone who only wanted a warm place to sit.

As the Brahms lieder progressed, she quickly unbraided the convex loop of braid, spreading the wavy hair over her shoulders.  She took her jump suit jacket off (yes, she really was braless) —there was some decal on her long-sleeve t-shirt.  It may have been a bird (as in Tweety), or I may only think that it was a bird because one of the Brahms lieder was about a “pretty bird”.  She rustled quietly among the bags and took out a tupperware container of pink yogurt and carefully spooned a few bites into her mouth, then closed it again.  After wiping her lips with her finger, she opened up her little black backpack, rummaged among its array of contents for a tube of skin lotion which she spread over her face.  After she put that tube back, she got another little bottle of lotion, which she rubbed into her hands.   I couldn’t help noticing, as I listened to another darting bit of Brahms, that the hands she rubbed with skin lotion looked well-manicured.

At this point, maybe, actually, some time before this point, I realized that I really did have to close my eyes if I was going to be able to hear the music at all.

This really did work.  With eyes closed, I could just be a beat, an ear, my mind amazingly blank.  Blank, that is, until I wondered what that woman was doing, and I’d just have to open my eyes for a second or two in order to check.

During a beautiful “Oh Shanandoah,” she flossed her teeth.  I turned away quickly.

During a beautiful spiritual “I been ‘buked”, she reviewed post cards on her lap

This is New York.  (Brooklyn actually, still New York.)

On the whole, I felt grateful.  I kept my eyes closed, more or less, anxious not to be distracted by the poor woman, anxious perhaps not to be like her.

Did I mention the second helping of pink yogurt?

The Pain You’re Not Supposed To Have If You Do Yoga Regularly

January 29, 2010

The Non-Multitasking Yogi

Pain.  I have all kinds of handwritten posts about Obama and trust in government that I was going to type up today.  But I wake up (that’s not actually correct since I don’t think I  slept), I get up with a figurative stake of ache in the middle of my upper back, which  precludes me from doing anything but looking absolutely straight in front of me.  (This means I  can’t type anything pre-jotted.)

People who do yoga everyday are not supposed to have back pain.  I do yoga everyday.

The catch is that people who also multi-task nonstop really do not do yoga all that well.  Real yoga involves taking the time to breathe, sustain, to focus.  Multi-tasking yoga is a bit of a whipstitch physically—it may hold body and soul together, but just barely.

I practice ashtanga yoga (a great form for home practice, developed primarily by Shri K. Patabhi Jois).  And yesterday evening, because I had skipped my normal rushed morning’s practice,  I took the time to do it well.   I not only did it well, in my guilt over skipping, I did twice as much as normal.

(Guilt and yoga are not a great combination.)

Ashtanga yoga is done as a series of pre-set exercises.  When you have done a couple of the series for some years, they are pretty much imprinted on your brain and body.  In other words, once you start one, you just kind of go through it like a dance routine or a song.

The power of a routine is incredibly strong.   A routine, in this case, the yoga series can, amazingly, carry you through all kinds of physical or mental failings.   I have done ashtanga with colds, hangovers, pulled muscles, torn cartilege.

The routine, like a memorized song, must be stored in a different part of the brain than the part involved with decision-making, fear, tentativeness, even perhaps common sense.    (I always think of victims of strokes who cannot speak but who can speak or recite poetry.)

While you are in the middle of the routine, you are simply swept along.  But once you are out of the routine’s anesthesizing groove….

Oops.

After Multi-tasking Yoga

Even After the iPad – Reasons to Stick With Books – The Bath

January 28, 2010

Bathtub Book

Even After the iPad;  Reasons to Stick to Books.

1.  You can take them into the bath.

2.  You can drop them in the bath (and, if you don’t mind rumpled pages, read on, without being electrocuted.)

3.  You can also drop them on the floor. (For example, at the side of your bed.)

4.  You can spill tea on them.

5.  Or pizza.  (Though it’s not so easy to spill pizza, even on a book.)

6.  They sometimes open to your favorite spots automatically.  Othertimes they open to spots you hadn’t planned on, but are glad you found.

7.  You can underline sentences or whole passages (if you’re kind of OCD.)

8.  Or keep them absolutely pristine (if you’re really OCD.)

9.  Sometimes you find things in their pages that you’d completely forgotten about—an unpaid bill, a letter from an old friend, a wilted buttercup, a spot of tea (or pizza).

10.  Some books bear handwritten inscriptions, even just a name, perhaps your grandmother’s name.  You might read these more closely than what’s in print.

PS – if you like elephants, check out 1 Mississippi by Karin Gustafson on home page or Amazon.

 

PPS- I am linking this to Bluebell Books Short Story Slam; the prompt was a girl in a bath–this may be a girl elephant.

Apple iPad? With Elephants?

January 26, 2010

Will It Be As Good As This?

Hmmm…..

(Disclosure:  the illustrator is a fan of Apple and owns the stock.)

The Matrix on Cheetos

January 20, 2010

The Matrix On Cheetos

Two tremendously scary articles in today’s New York Times.

No, I don’t mean the one about Robert Gates in India warning of interlocking Asian terror networks.  Or the one about ex-convicts from the U.S. joining  with Yemen radicals.   Or even the ones about the defeat of Martha Coakly in Massachusetts.

I’m talking about the article by Jennifer Steinhauer reporting that “Snack Time Never Ends” for U.S. children, and the one by Tamar Lewin, “If Your Kids Are Awake, They Are Probably Online.” (This one reports that, with the advent of smart phones, personal computers, and other digital devices,  internet time never ends for U.S. children.)

Reading these articles, one gets a picture of a U.S. child blindfolded by a miniature screen, which he manipulates with one hand, while using the other to repeatedly lift crinkly snacks to his lips.  (It’s kind of like the Matrix on Cheetos.)

I don’t mean to sound critical.  I myself spend much of the day on the computer.  I am also an inveterate “grazer.”

The difference between me and most U.S. children, however, is that I’m old enough to know better.  I have had enough experience of the benefits of (a) uninterrupted concentration, (b) delayed gratification, and (c) discipline, to understand that there is something to be gained from thinking deeply and quietly while repressing the urge for non-stop stomach and mind candy.  Even my body (especially the toothy bits)  has a deep (if sometimes neglected) understanding of the benefits of not constantly chewing.

In other words, I feel guilty.

My personal difficulties bring up the fact that adult society has, to a large degree, fomented this conduct among children.   In the case of adults,  however,  ADD (attention deficit disorder) is generally called “multi-tasking.”

It’s bad for us too.   There has been study upon study about the dangers of texting while driving, texting while walking, texting while taking care of young children.  Then, of course, there are the soaring obestity rates.

But it all seems worse when children are involved.

Though I  don’t mean to criticize parents, part of the problem is simply their  busy-ness.   Working hard, their lives, and the lives of their children, are highly scheduled.  Snacks and media are used to silence childish impatience;  both allow parents to participate in their children’s lives in a way that makes them feel (and is) caring, as cook, food-buyer, internet-regulator, but is also somehow less personal and confrontational, than acting as direct companion and/or adversary.

Older generations focused on the behavior of children (and both parents and children had the relief of unsupervised play–time that was free and apart from each other); but in our world, it’s not enough for children behave the way that we want them to;  we also want them to be happy while behaving this way (while remaining in a fairly confined location).   Some parents trot out long explanations to children, trying to secure agreement to restrictions;  others (or maybe the same parents) trot out snacks, gameboys, smart phones, trying to pre-empt disagreement, discomfort, wear and tear.

It doesn’t really work.  But the parent is busy, stressed;  besides, he or she has some browsing to do.

The Downside of a Three-Day Weekend

January 19, 2010

Tuesday Morning

That it’s not four days.

(Check out 1 Mississippi, also by Karin Gustafson, if you like elephants, and sleep.)

Sad Day

January 14, 2010

Sad Day

All rights reserved.  Karin Gustafson.

Icy Cold

January 10, 2010

Icy Cold

Too cold for dogs, elephants, ManicDDaily.

If you like your elephants warmer, check out 1 Mississippi by Karin Gustafson.

Between a Rock and a Hard Place – Learning From Sookie Stackhouse

January 6, 2010

Between a Rock and a Hard Place

Between a rock and a hard place.  A universal locale.  One we’ve all visited.  Where some of us even live.

One reason I’m enamored of the Southern Vampire series (Sookie Stackhouse/True Blood novels) is that Sookie frequently finds herself in such a position.  (Frankly, even being in one of her vampire lover’s arms is such a place, given the marble musculature, and all that business with the fangs.)

One of the series’ most classic rock-and-hard-place moments occurs in Altogether Dead, when Andre, chief aide-de-camp of the Vampire Queen of Louisiana, demands a blood exchange with Sookie to ensure her loyalty to the Queen.  (Another thing I like about the books is their complete silliness.)  Before Andre can force Sookie to take his blood, the dynamic and debonairly handsome vampire Eric Northman appears, and persuades Andre that he should be the substitute blood exchangee, since he too is a minion of the Queen of Louisiana.  Eric then must convince Sookie that exchanging blood with him is her best shot, the lesser of two evils.

What a dilemma.  Sookie must choose between the dry, calculating, mean, Andre and the super-sexy, protective, and ruthless but loving, Eric Northman.  (Did I mention spoiler alert that Eric is also wealthy, constantly giving Sookie things like a new driveway, a new coat, and a new cell phone?)

Talk about escapism.  Sookie’s choice between a rock and hard place is a bit like a choice between Death Valley in a heat wave and a cliff jump into an exhilarating stream.

In the non-fictional world, unfortunately, our hard choices tend to be a bit more murky (a choice, say, between this sick feeling in our stomach and that sick feeling in our stomach), and it is hard to embue them with a sense of excitement.

Note that my mention of stomach feelings.  This may be because I tend to view a decisive step as something that turns my stomach (in the aforementioned sickly way), rather than churns it (with a feel of adventure).  The problem is that I seem generally convinced that there is an absolutely right choice, and that that choice, undoubtedly, hasn’t even crossed my mind.  This aggrandizes the making of a decision in an awful way– I am not only deciding an immediate issue; I am being subjected to a test–of my decision-making capacity, my wisdom, my worth as a human being.

Since I’m still in New Year’s resolution mode, I ask myself what to do about this problem.  How does one turn the spot between a rock and a hard place into a forward-leading path?  Okay, scratch that.  How does one turn it into a place where one is not simply banging one’s head?   How does one recognize that the spot between the rock and hard place is sometimes located in one’s own cerebral cortex?

Back to the Sookie Stackhouse model:  she is an example of forthrightness and aplomb, but she is also beaten, shot, or bitten, on nearly every other page.   She also has (i) this wonderfully delicious blood, (ii) valuable telepathic abilities, and (iii) a great figure, all of which seem to mean that she can indulge in a fair amount of righteous an extremely vocal indignation whenever she is faced with a hard decision, and always be totally forgiven.  She is a good enough character that she suffers regrets, qualms, and remorse, but, generally, once she makes a decision, she learns to make the best of it.

I don’t want to be shot or bitten; and I have no idea of the quality of my blood.  (I’m also out of the running for Sookie’s other two enumerated qualities.)  So, that leaves me with …regrets, qualms, remorse (I’ve got those covered)…making the best of it.  The best in this case has nothing to do with perfectionism.

Good old Sookie.

(Caveat—I’ve never seen the TV show True Blood, but only read the Charlaine Harris novels.   Sorry for any spoilers or differences.)

(P.S. Click the link to see Sookie, Eric and Bill Compton as turtles,  or as elephants.

(Post-Script – if you like elephants, check out 1 Mississippi by Karin Gustafson.)