Posted tagged ‘Tritina’

Night Feeding

January 25, 2015


Night Feeding

As the baby nursed,
fingers opened like petals bloomed,
coaxing the breast

as if a huge bee–the breast,
being all the baby knew while nursed,
her mother in flushed bloom.

If flesh were cloth, they would be loomed
as a single weave, the breast,
the fingers, the baby, mother, nursed,

the shuttle sighing, nursed back, forth,
the pattern resting its bloom
against night’s breast.


Here’s a tritina of sorts (like half a sestina) for Margaret Bednar’s Play It Again Sam on With Real Toads to return to a selected archived prompt.  I’ve used Kerry O’Connor’s prompt to write a flowery poem in an unflowery or uncliched way–this is rather flowery and rather a cliche, I’m afraid–but in writing it,  I was also thinking of Hedgewitch’s cascade prompt–a poem with repeating lines.  Repeating lines were too much for me, but this repeats words!

Essentially, I am saying that I cheated on both prompts, but since I use two–perhaps it adds up to one submission.  (The drawing like the poem is mine; I’m not much good at hands; still, all rights reserved.) 


Ground Zero Sight (In new “Freedom Tower”) – Tritina

August 30, 2012


Ground Zero Sight (In new “Freedom Tower”)

I walked where gaps in late rush hour led,
threading my way through shoulders crowding,
till random retinal rod looked up, saw

moon–not in sky, but in new tower’s glass–saw-
ing from rectangle to round as crowding
panels re-cut and perspective, led

by my tilt of head and careful crowding
steps, re-shaped; and, for once, the site did not saw
my chest in two– hewn norm since that morning of lead —

but led to wonder, crowding out (for moonrise moment) what–I saw.
Agh!  the last line was originally intended to run over into the next – but the runover would not be indented so settled for dash.  Also, original version of this post used “that” instead of “what” which I think was a bit more confusing than the “what.” 

The above is a “tritina”, a form of mini-sestina, that repeats in intersecting order the last words of the line. I am posting it for the dVerse Poets Pub “Form For All” challenge hosted today by the wonderful craftsman Samuel Peralta (a/k/a Semaphore).

The photo taken last night on my iPhone shows the new Freedom Tower being built at Ground Zero to replace the old World Trade Center. I was startled to see the reflection of the moon in the lower left hand corner – it’s that small round speck there. It shifted, of course, as I moved, especially given the right-angled glass panels.

The photo below is the view from the other side.

Check out dVerse, Sam’s article on Tritinas and my books! Poetry, GOING ON SOMEWHERE, (by Karin Gustafson, illustrated by Diana Barco). 1 Mississippi -counting book for lovers of rivers, light and pachyderms, or Nose Dive, a very fun novel that is perfect for a pool or beachside escape. Nose Dive is available on Kindle for just 99 cents!