Archive for October 2009

Balloon Boy – His Father Tempting Not Just Authorities But Fate

October 19, 2009

One of the great ironies of the story of Falcon Heene, the boy who was not found in his father’s helium balloon was that in fact the boy was caught in another kind of bubble of his dad’s, a bubble of grandiosity, delusion, deception, craziness.

As almost everyone in the U.S. now knows, Richard Heene (the father) thought he’d raise media hype to both a new high (about 11,000 feet) and, possibly, a new low.  His hope was apparently to create some kind of family “reality” tale, which, like many, was based not on reality but a perverse pursuit of drama and attention.

Heene’s sons, particularly Falcon, were caught up in this drama as compelling foils.  All kids are cute, but these boys are really cute; little Artful Dodgers, as it were, to Heene and his wife’s Fagan and Nancy.  (Unfortunately, reports of Heene’s temper and of a complaint of domestic violence also bring up worrisome hints of Bill Sykes.)

You can’t help but feel incredibly sorry for the kids, especially Falcon (maybe as much of an Oliver as an Arful Dodger), whose discomfort was enough to make him physically ill during two TV interviews, literally sick to his stomach.  Oddly, the guilt he must feel now stems largely from honesty, from openly alluding to his father’s script.

The whole story raises a lot of questions both about Heene and about the reality show culture.

But one of the questions that hits me the hardest is not how Heene could have had the chutzpah, or the incentive, to try to fool the authorities, but simply how he could have stood to tempt fate in this awful way.

Most people, certainly in the traditional world, but also today, would not even speak theoretically of possible ill befalling their children.  Many people would have difficulty actually forming words around such horrible speculations.  I am an attorney in my real life, and even when writing memos related to estate planning, I frequently use vague, pablumesque, words to describe the future mortality of a loved one:  “if something were to happen to” so-and-so, I write.  “Pre-decease” is another good, legalistic word, simply because it is both Latinate and elaborate enough to create distance from what it truly means.

“God forbid” was and continues to be the typical phrase of protection against such terrible speculation.  “God forbid,” combined, after a silent prayer, and then perhaps a  knock on the head.  (Something wooden.)

One hates to see families split up. But you can’t help but worry about those kids in their father’s bubble, whether up in the air, or firmly tethered in their own back yard.

Didn’t work.

October 19, 2009

Yea Mariano! – Go Yankees!

October 19, 2009
Go Yankees!

Go Yankees!

Just got home to see Mariano pull Yankees out of tight spot, Angels everywhere.   I’m posting for good luck!  Sorry for the repetition (but if Yankees repeat winning….)

Robert Pattinson Unmasked, Carefully Carved

October 18, 2009

In the blues of Sunday evening, I looked up two conflicting articles in the blogosphere.  Both about you know who.  (Hint—it’s not Voldemort.)

They present an interesting contrast.  One is from an internet site called Irish Central, which has never liked Robert Pattinson because of all the attention he (inadvertently) stole from the Irish actor, Pierce Brosnan, in the filming of Remember Me in New York this past summer.   Irish Central had a few articles back then (i) comparing the relative virtues of RPatz and Brosnan –you can guess who came out ahead, and (ii) saying how much friendlier Brosnan was to fans.  (Of course, Brosnan was not the guy who was grabbed from every direction, chased into collisions with taxi cabs, and forced to stand in a seven foot high box during breaks in the on-street filming.)

In this weekend’s Irish Central article, focusing on bestselling Halloween masks (presumably in Ireland), the Central reports, snarkily, that the mask of the “pretty boy” vampire isn’t even in the top ten.  It goes on to mock Rob: “if your halloween mask won’t sell, what kind of horror film movie star are you?”

Irish Central bases its snarkiness on one major misapprehension—the Twilight films aren’t horror films, they are romances.  Since when do romantic heroes sell Halloween masks?

Never.  What romantic heroes apparently sell at Halloween (or distribute in large numbers free of charge) are pumpkin stencils!  I learned this from another, much smaller, internet site called Huliq, which reports on the popularity of free downloadable pumpkin stencils of RPatz as Edward Cullen.  (You know the pose–it’s the same one used on the RPatz shower curtain–he looks angry/determined with criss-crossing eyebrows, and puffed- up hair.)

I took a look at these stencils, and frankly, you’d have to have the manual dexterity of Michelangelo to carve one into a pumpkin.  (Although the directions helpfully suggest using toothpicks to hold the bridge of the nose in place.)

Which brings up another mistake in Irish Central’s whole put-down of RPatz.  Who even wears big rubber cover-your-whole face Halloween masks?  Not young women.  Not ‘tween girls.  Not even older, weird, women.   Not, in other words, Pattinson’s primary fan base.

But who, one wonders, carves Robert Pattinson pumpkin faces?

Simple!  People who want to win a Rob-O-Lantern contest!

What a world/internet.
P.S. If you want help with elephant-o-lanterns, check out 1 Mississippi by Karin Gustafson on link above or at Amazon.

Baseball and Life – Yankees-Angels Game 2 – The Blink Factor/The Not-Blinking Factor-Boom Boom Boom

October 18, 2009

My good luck tricks seemed to have worked once more for the Yankees—i.e. last night during the second Yankees-Angels game, I posted my elephant baseball picture AND, at a certain critical juncture, stopped watching.   (See earlier post re good luck “Talismans” and my personal effect on Yankees’ baseball.)

I won’t take all the credit for the victory—there was also Jeter, Cano, and Mariano, Jerry Hairston, Jr., A-Rod, and Damon (who made some really terrific catches), Melky Cabrera, Phil Coke, and Joba (who still seems a little pudgy boy to me especially when he celebrates), and Molina, who had a really hard job as catcher for A.J. Burnett, who also, as starter, deserves some credit, despite the way in which his wild pitches can drive a fan crazy.  (The frustration he causes is frankly not completely redeemed by the whipped cream pies.)

Then, there was just the Yankee grit, that somehow, so frequently, manages to just hang on and on and on.

Watching the videos of the end of the game this morning made me think (yes, it’s a cliché) of baseball as a paradigm of life.  Yes, again, yes, it’s a cliché.  Still, it seems somehow a more appropriate paradigm than a lot of other big sports.  (Which I have to confess don’t interest me enough to know much about them.  Still, I hate to think of any sports in which (i) people are repeatedly tackled and concussed, or (ii) forced to chase around constantly with little chance of achieving many goals, as better paradigms.)
What is unusual about baseball is simply how fast everything moves when it does, finally, move at all.   The replays of the last moments of last night’s October 17th game against the Angels are particularly striking.  On the Yankees’ site, they show footage taken from nearly every angle, even one that simply shows Cabrera running, relatively quickly for a big guy, to first.

In case, you didn’t follow the game, in the thirteenth inning, with a man on first and second, Yankee Melky Cabrera hit a ball that bounced between first and second.  The Angels’ second baseman, Maicer Izturis, stopped the ball, then, trying for a double play, threw it hard and fast to Angels’ short stop Erik Aybar, who stood at second, and who frankly seems like a really a surly, cocky sort of guy (if you are a Yankee’s fan), who missed it.  The Angel’s third baseman, Chone Figgins, stopped Izturis’s throw, but bobbled the ball.  In the meantime, Hairston Jr., who’d been holding on third before Izturis’s error, dashed towards home. Hairston was immediately overrun by the rest of the Yankees’ team and quickly assumed a fetal position on the ground as they all energetically patted him.

The long and short of that detailed explanation is simply that, although it takes a long time to write it all down, the play actually happened in an incredibly short period of time:  boom (Cabrera connected with the ball), boom (Iztura stopped and immediately threw it), boom (it slid below Aymer’s glove), boom (Figgins bobbled it), boom (Hairston slid into home).  When the footage that just focuses on Cabrera is shown, you see from the way that he turns, delighted, that the run has already been scored even as he makes it to first base.

The speed of it all is especially amazing because most of baseball is so slow.  The pitcher stands and postures, eyes narrowing and re-narrowing, with little shakes or nods of the head to the catcher, the batter (if Jeter especially), re-tightens his gloves (two or three or four times), re-squares his shoulders, gently sways the bat,  everyone constantly repositions their stances (usually spitting or blowing a bubble at the same time in a sort of homage to old-time multi-tasking).  Everyone, pitcher, batter, catcher, batter, in and out fielders, both wait and prepares.  Even the audience waits, though it doesn’t prepare so much as eats and drinks, crosses its fingers and yells. So much waiting, so much preparation, so much eating and drinking, finger-crossing  and yelling.  And then, boom, boom, boom, boom.  The moment arrives and players are suddenly expect to act, react, not just to make decisions, but to carry them out – boom boom boom.

Okay, you get it.  This is where the paradigm part comes in. There are obvious parallels to situations in the marketplace–buying and selling on the stock market, buying and selling anything, anywhere.  And also to moving around a potentially dangerous world–driving a car, for example,  especially in, or around, an accident.  The way action unfolds in baseball parallels many emergency situations actually; an emergency, a threat, that can also turn into an opportunity (i.e. the near double-play that becomes a winning score for the opposite side.)

So many parallels:  the need to be able to act even in the midst of a mouthful! The need to keep a mouthful going in order to be able to act!  The blink factor!  Or, maybe it’s the not-blinking factor!  The waiting, the planning, the practice, and then the OMG moment, which never takes exactly the shape anticipated, and frequently involves both a solo effort AND team work, and if not exactly team work, at least the avoidance of collision.  (A-Rod and Mariano were a great example of that in the tenth inning when they both ran towards a flying bunt, which was then caught by Mariano.)

Ah, Mariano….

Go Mariano!!!

October 17, 2009

There’s nothing else to say at 11:01.

(Bottom of 8th, second game against Angels, October 17, 2009)

Just in Case – Go Yankees!

October 17, 2009
Go Yankees!

Go Yankees!

I’m posting this just in case.  (See post re Talismans and Yankees.)  But it may take more than a picture tonight.

If you’re too nervous to watch the Yankees in a jam, try 1 Mississippi, by Karin Gustafson, at link above.

Who Needs Water? Drilling the Marcellus Shale

October 17, 2009

Ten Reasons (That Anyone Can Understand) Why New York Should Say No to Upstate Natural Gas Drilling.

1.  You need water to make beer.

2.  Even a cold bath is better than one that leaves you with boils.

3.  Casino-Resorts without (a) hot tubs (that don’t leave you with boils), or (b) good beer (I’ve heard Adirondack is infinitely superior to Coors) tend to go bust.

4.   Milk is good for your teeth.

5.  Mountains are good for your soul.

6.   When the animals go, we’re next.

7.   It’s hard to create jobs in a place where you can’t drink, bathe, feed animals, or wash clothes in the water.

8.  It’s hard to keep jobs downstream of a place where you can’t—oops! Correction.  It’s hard to keep jobs in a place whose reservoirs hold water that can’t be drunk, bathed in, or used for any human or animal purpose.

9.  Wyoming was once a beautiful state.

10.  And I haven’t heard that it’s become the jobs capital of the country.

Six Reasons Why New York Should Say Yes to Natural Gas Drilling

1.  I can take my one-time drilling lease payment and rent a trailer (maybe) somewhere a whole lot warmer than Upstate New York.

2.  Those stupid dairy cows really build up a stench.

3.   Coors is okay by me.   (Better not drill in Colorado.)

4.  Mountains make me carsick.

5.  Those stupid, rich, New Yorkers—don’t they just buy bottled water?

6.  They don’t use water to make diet soda, do they?  Regular?

Go Yankees! (Hoping for Luck)

October 16, 2009
Go Yankees!

Go Yankees!

Yes, I’ve posted this picture before, but it was lucky last time.

Yes, the Yankees are overpaid.

But they are the Yankees.  And I am from New York.

And they are the Yankees.

Friday – Weekend Projects (The Creative Ones You Put Off) – Don’t Put Them Off

October 16, 2009

Friday!  Finally.  The boy not in the balloon is safe and Where The Wild Things Are is primarily in movie theaters.

For those of you who like to do creative projects (write, paint, write some more), and have limited freedom and focus, now is the time to get going.  (School has started, Halloween is not yet here, Thanksgiving/Christmas are still genuinely still far away.)

My primary immediate advice: take the time.   Make an appointment with yourself, for yourself, time for your work.  Schedule a slot in what may otherwise seem an inpenetrable weekend—10-1, Saturday–your work time.  Don’t just pencil it in;  write it in indelible ink.  Then, don’t allow a conflict; don’t take on a chore; don’t slip into an accidental cancellation, don’t cut yourself short.  (It may be best not to tell others what that Saturday appointment is for.  You may also need to turn off your internet access.)

My secondary advice, before starting and before turning off your internet:  check out the series of posts I wrote in July and August about writer’s block.  Although these were specifically about “blocking writer’s block”, many of them can apply to other types of creative blocks as well, particularly those aspects related to taking yourself seriously.  (These posts can be found by clicking the “category” on the side called Writer’s Block: some of the ones categorized under Stress may also apply, especially to less writerly blocks.)

If you have writer’s block (or some other creative block), I can’t guarantee that these will help you.  But you may find something useful. Reading them may also give you that one more little justifiable delay (ha ha!), which (it is to be hoped) may serve as a springboard into a wellspring of creative flow.

Good luck!

(If none of that works, you can always go to Where the Wild Things Are, or check out another children’s animal book, 1 Mississippi, by Karin Gustafson, at the link to the side.)