ManicDDaily

I live in downtown Manhattan, all too close to Ground Zero.  I did not live quite as close on September 11, 2001, but close enough.  I saw the second plane hit, ran down the blocks from my apartment to the site.  I remember trying to moisten towels before I headed down there with some idea that these would be useful for breathing through smoke and dust, but the water pressure was so low, and the emotional pressure so high, that I can’t be sure if I actually either wet the towels, or carried them.   For weeks and months afterwards, the smoke and smell of the extinguished towers hung over our daily lives; for years afterwards, it’s caused great sadness.

It’s also instilled a fear of further terrorism.   It is difficult for me, for example, to leave family members in Manhattan if I need to travel elsewhere.   Many who live in this neighborhood hate the fireworks over the Hudson River,  summer nights.   I don’t mind the fireworks but I freely confess that I may not be able to continue living here once the “Freedom Tower” actually goes up.

As an already terrorized New Yorker,  I am fearful of any activity that makes downtown Manhattan a greater target.  We have already been through the trial of 9/11 itself down here.  But my stronger, and perhaps overly-idealistic, feeling is that  you have to at least try to live your beliefs, both on a personal and national level.  If you tout your legal system, then you have to trust it.  If the whole conflict is about what the U.S. stands for (other than materialism), then we have to actually stand for those things, things like trials.

Even as I wish it weren’t all going to take place just a few blocks away.