Posted tagged ‘I’m with her!’

What My 18-Year Old Self Would Have Thought – Another Reason I’m With Her

November 6, 2016


I keep trying to remember what my 18 year old self would have thought of a woman running for President.

It is hard for my nearly 60-year old self to recreate. There’s only one thing I am sure of.

If someone had told me that the U.S. would NOT have woman president,for the next forty years, I would not have believed it. Because I knew, of course, a woman could  be president; i.e. that women were certainly able enough.  I had gone to a girls’ high school, where all offices within the school–as in student council–were held by incredibly able young women. The administrators of the school were very able older women, though, we had, of course, a male head.

Yes, I also knew that my girls’ school had far far less funding than the partnering boy’s school–female alumnae just couldn’t give as much as male alumnae. But still, at the girls’ school, we were convinced that our actual academic and other achievements equaled or surpassed the achievements of those at the boys’ school, and that we too would use that education to do important things in the world.

Of course, many of my classmates have done such things, including having wonderful and informed children (one of the most important  things you can do for the world, and the only one I’m sure I’ve done.)

But the point is that I never, back then, would have believed that there would be so few women in high national office for so many many years.

I say this to those who think that it’s not a big deal that an able woman is finally in reach of high office.  I say this to those who don’t like Hillary because of her baggage (not understanding that women candidates especially of my generation carry a kind of baggage, women coming from days when they did not have much economic or political power, women who even now are deemed to carry the baggage of their families/spouses  in ways that men are not).  I say this to those that think,  of course, there will be other women coming to fill high office, other better women.

Another thing my 18-year old self never imagined:  that in this 21st century, to be a woman with any national exposure in the United States, you have to be as made-up i.e. cosmeticized as a fashion model.  That a woman would have to have styled hair and styled eyes to maintain a place on the national scene.  This is especially the case of many female newscasters, unfortunately, the most visible women in national prominence– (The only ones that seem to get a break are gay women.)

Geez.  What happened to the old (as in young) Barbara Walters and Jane Pauley?
I think I can safely say that Shirley Chisolm and Bella Abzug did not take a lot of time over their make-up.

So, what is the point of this post?

  1.  I am so sick of women having to fit into those heels and those eyes.
  2. Do not underestimate the type of squeezing and carrying that women have to undertake to qualify for prominence in this country.
  3. Don’t assume that, of course, there will be a woman president soon (as in, but just not Hillary Clinton.)
  4. Vote.  And more than vote, support.  At least for the next few days.  For this now, let go of the back-biting.  Make it happen.


October 15, 2016


I am inspired by Michelle Obama to do more.

Yes, I’ve felt sick to my stomach, but that’s not a reason to stick to the sidelines

It’s not just the Billy Bush/Donald Trump bus tape –though, like Michelle, that has shaken me to my core. (If you have ever been prey to a person who’s tried to use money, power, body weight. and your learned compliance against you–and I think there are a whole lot of women who have had had this experience–it’s pretty hard not to feel sickened–)

Though I was fed up to Trump before the surfacing of his “sex” tape. His much-voiced wish for stretchers for protesters (especially if they areAfrican American or Latino)–was enough for me–

But what’s making me particularly sick and worried right now is that the sordidness of this election will just turn people off.  What I fear is that the ickiness of Trump and the stickiness of his smears are making some people feel like simply stepping away, as if voting will somehow sully their hands, as if pressing that little lever for either deciding choice will stain them.

There is nothing farther from the truth.  First, the two candidates are NOT the same.  Donald Trump is a bullying serial liar whose attention span appears to be limited to 150 characters.  Hillary is an intensely hard worker, who studies the issues, tries to understand various sides of a question, is knowledgeable about history and geography, social conditions, science and policy–

“Hang the b—-” Trump supporters yell.  “Lock her up.”

This is unheard of in a democracy; this is not a joke.

It feels especially sickening that Trump and his supporters trumpet their threats at a woman in this manner.  (Trump literally sics his supporters on!)  This is not about a side show of emails.  This is not about a speech at Goldman Sachs.  Rather this smacks to me of  “how dare SHE?”

As in, how dare SHE be smart and SHOW that SHE is smart?

How dare SHE stand up to insult and abuse?  How dare SHE transcend personal humiliation?

How dare SHE answer back with sense and factual support?  (Or, omg, complexity!)

How dare SHE be ambitious?  How dare SHE be successful? How dare SHE be inclusive?  How dare SHE even smile like that when we are talking to her?

(We’ll put her in her place!)

I am another SHE and I am frankly astounded by Hillary’s bravery.  (The effrontery of it!)   She has taken so much bullying and sullying, and still, she listens to what others have to say, and still she speaks out on their and our behalf, and still she stands straight and calm and ready to move ahead–

Come on, people, we can’t just sit this one out.  Your vote is one certain way to make a difference.  Not voting does not absolve you from an outcome, nor will it safeguard you from the election’s results.  Make it count.


Here’s another piece pro-Hillary.  I am so upset by the election–not sure what I can do to help Hillary’s side, but I do mean to start at least posting some of things I’ve been thinking. Even if they have no effect or are in an echo-chamber, etc. etc. they make me feel better. 

PS – thank you, Michelle Obama, for wonderful speech in NH.  I spent a long time today trying to do a picture of Michelle!  Nothing could convey her life force and grace.  Oh well!  


Sad Tonight as Woman and (Mostly) New Yorker

September 19, 2016