Tried to Make a Nest

Tried to make a nest

She tried to make a nest upon his chest,
as if by folding into him
she could get him to hold her.

She liked to think of the light there as blue
but it was grey.
The chill of cement
as she walked to him, then bent to look for
a hollow, to fit into
a hollow,
could still be recalled
by her bared feet,
the hard cement beneath
whatever they covered it with.



Draftish poem for Marian’s prompt on Real Toads about changes in love. 

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9 Comments on “Tried to Make a Nest”

  1. kanzensakura Says:

    That first stanza is heartbreaking. The rest of the poem is equally as sad.

  2. Very graphic; palpable. And so sad.

  3. wildchild47 Says:

    This is piercing, it speaks with the longing of loss, the hollowness in wandering, hoping, searching – the imagery is cool in the mind and hurts the heart – well done for this far-reaching poem. 🙂

  4. Jim Says:

    Hard heart towards her, he took and stood her off.

  5. M Says:

    I can really feel this one, K . So good to see you ~

  6. Brendan Says:

    Such regnant sadness here, so simply and devastatingly put. When a love passes, fades, wanes or fails–who knows toward what transformation–what baby bird does not feel kicked from the nest? Great to read you here.

  7. Marian Says:

    Your style, with the slant rhymes and slight repetition, really works in describing this. I recognize this. Also hello!

  8. sanaarizvi Says:

    Oh my aching heart … this is so evocative!

  9. Kerry Says:

    Karin, so wonderful to read your poetry. I love how you do not unfold all to the reader but present an abstract rendition of your theme. I feel the cold cement, caught halfway between the blue and the grey.

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