Not Pulling It Over Anyone’s Eyes Here

Brrr.....

Brrr….. (Note that wool socks are not being worn)

Not Pulling It Over Anyone’s Eyes Here

The cold is truly fine for those
with knitted wool upon their toes.
Silk liners make it even finer–
(forget your cottons, hose nyloner).
Wool underwear’s another must
over your bum and on your bust.
And sweaters–wool again, my dear–
else the cloth of some clove-footed peer–
a goat, alpaca, maybe yak–
(frizzy fuzz from someone’s back).
More wool or fleece to wrap your legs
or down, if on bent knee each begs–
(for down, oh down, I rank it highest,
though perhaps it’s best when cold is dryest–)

Picture your bod as princess pea–
your layers multi-mattressy
(not only are you safe from freeze,
your limbs will also bounce off trees).
Though novices claim itchy pain,
wool never hardly shows a stain,
so you can scratch that same long john
without a break all winter long,
unless, of course, you’ve got the heat
of someone else beneath your sheet.
Oh sure, sometimes space can get tight,
the two of you may even fight,
but a cure for any winter schism
is the other’s high metabolism,
keeping far the bitter cold
just as well as weave from 
sheepish fold.

***************************

Here’s a sort of poem for Fireblossom (Shay’s Word Garden) Friday on With Real Toads to write about winter.  I realize that, as a vegetarian, I neglected to extoll the virtues of fur–I’m not really in favor of new fur (given my sense of how it’s produced), but if you can find something old and long ago taken, it is also pretty darn warm. 

The picture is an old drawing of Pearl, also now gone.  I alway tried to persuade her of the virtues of wool, but perhaps being a lamb in wolf’s clothing–or the reverse–she was wary of it. 

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15 Comments on “Not Pulling It Over Anyone’s Eyes Here”


  1. Love this. It’s like a mother’s sound advice, with a perfect rhythm to match the text. And yes I do agree, wool is the best.. When going to the mountains it’s the only thing that really works.

  2. Kerry O'Connor Says:

    At least wool is a renewable resource (fur is a definite no-no for me). I love the bounce of this, Karin. You have had such fun with your rhymes and word play and I read it through with a smile of delight. At the same time, I do not envy northerners the claustrophobia of too many layers of clothing. We have a short sharp winter, with temps seldom plunging below zero (celsius). I hardly ever have need for a coat, let alone long johns.

    • ManicDdaily Says:

      Thanks–yes, we are in a different world, well, at least where I live now. I have just gotten up and put on a coat and hat to sit in my dining room! You do get used to it! But, of course, it makes going outside a much bigger deal. k.

      On Fri, Jan 16, 2015 at 2:14 AM, ManicDDaily wrote:

      >

  3. hedgewitch Says:

    I started laughing about a third of the way through this, and only by a preternaturally strong grip on myself avoided snorting coffee on my keyboard. The added benefit of being able to bounce off trees almost makes me want to bundle up in wool, which gives me hives. ;_) Such fun,k, and very crafty and nicely metered and rhymed, too. May warmth of all the best kinds come your way this frigid winter.

    • ManicDdaily Says:

      Thanks! Sorry about the hives–it is great stuff. I had an extra beat in that line re trees, I realized, but fixed now, looking back! (Or at least I think I had an extra beat–the problem if you do these things without actually counting, is that you can change the rhythm as you read–making it work just because you want to–but hopefully others will too.) Unfortunately, we have the cold this year but only a frosting of snow–meaning I wish we had more snow. k.


  4. I love the sketch of your precious Pearl, and so enjoyed this witty poem. Various ways to get warm……..my fabric of choice these days is fleece, of which I have pj’s and fleecy blankets. Yes, I am old.


  5. Love it. Funny but oh so true.

  6. margaret Says:

    The new wools of today are wonderful! This is adorable and fun.

  7. coalblack Says:

    Awww, it’s Pearl! Hi, Pearl! This poem is so clever and cute. I adore it, especially “multi-mattressy” and the bouncing off trees!


  8. So much to love in this…I needed to smile and thank you for giving me several.

  9. Suyash_J Says:

    hillariously good

  10. Susan Says:

    Hahaha–In the end it’s skin on skin, isn’t it?

    Love thexe turn arounds:

    “else the cloth of some clove-footed peer–
    a goat, alpaca, maybe yak–
    (frizzy fuzz from someone’s back).”
    and
    “Though novices claim itchy pain,
    wool never hardly shows a stain,
    so you can scratch that same long john
    without a break all winter long,”

    I mean, if washing is a nono in the winter, what would be better?

  11. Brendan Says:

    The rhythm of this was like scratching at a wool itch. A hitch in the corpus but no cause for interruptus of coitus. In Florida the boon’s at the other end of the spectrum — light, lighter and lightest cottons.


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