“Idiomatic” Poem (“Bits and Pieces”)

DVerse Poets Pub, a great community for struggling and less struggling (i.e. successful) poets, has a poetics challenge today requesting poems written with idiomatic language.  The idioms I use are not so colorful as let’s say, letting the cat out of the bag, but here’s the poem:

Bits and Pieces

Bits and pieces make a whole;
we use them to fill up a hole
shaped like a merely mortal soul.
Bits and pieces take their toll.

Bits and pieces don’t seem real,
and yet they occupy that reel
of all we say and do and feel
beneath the ever-thickening peel.

Bits and pieces are what we’ve got–
all that’s left and not forgot
(after all that time we shot).
Were they all we ever sought?

That can’t be true, we wanted more.
Surely, they’re what we settled for
and now somehow must find enough,
forget the diamonds, love the rough.

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16 Comments on ““Idiomatic” Poem (“Bits and Pieces”)”

  1. claudia Says:

    i would forget the diamonds any time and exchange them with bits and pieces of poetry or sunshine or springrain…smiles.

  2. brian miller Says:

    diamonds in the rough..really like your play on that in the last line…if rough is where we are there is room enough for love…great end rhymes as well..smiles.

  3. jenneandrews Says:

    great dalliance and word play here– xxxxj

  4. Sheila Moore Says:

    forget the diamonds love the rough – awesome last line! I really enjoyed the sing-song flow and rhyme of this – every bit and piece 😉

  5. Heaven Says:

    i enjoyed this… specially the last line.. love the rough ~

  6. hobgoblin2011 Says:

    This is great, I love the lines and the rhyme just notched it up a bit-great job, thoroughly enjoyed, thanks

  7. Bodhirose Says:

    I really enjoyed this–beautifully and cleverly rhymed and tied up nicely with the last line.

  8. Mary Says:

    So many treasures to be found in ‘bits and pieces.’ Yes, forget the diamonds.

  9. zongrik Says:

    love the rough and rough love….hmmmm

  10. Yousei Hime Says:

    Delightful. Not too much rhyming poetry these days, and yours read smoothly.

  11. Mohana Says:

    Nice one here. Like it!

  12. Ravenblack Says:

    Overly polished jewels sometimes lack surprise, predictably cut at certain fixed angles, the joy is the rough, looking into bit and pieces, finding hidden gems. Thoughtful poem and very nice. 🙂

  13. tinkwelborn Says:

    ha. it’s the bits n pieces we’re never taught in growing up — only the ‘formal’ stuff.

    good piece.

  14. Anonymous Says:

    love the love and rough…its too good to hear!!!

  15. Lindy Lee Says:

    Yes, well made point, “forget the diamonds”…

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