August Night

DSC00604

August Night

The mist would not show
the full moon, but glowed
outside the window
like snow just fallen
and about to fall,
the night both pale and flushed
as if it had snuck out to a dance
for which it was far
too young, shoulders swathed
in a stole borrowed
without the owner’s knowledge–

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55 for Kerry O’Connor’s prompt on With Real Toads. (It was also my first try for Hedgewitch’s tonal prompt on Toads, but couldn’t quite decide it was done.)   Pic is mine; all rights reserved.

 

 

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19 Comments on “August Night”

  1. hedgewitch's avatar hedgewitch Says:

    I just love the idea of the night out on the tiles without parental permission–and the way the words meet and pass on that beautiful misty landscape/dancefloor–at first I thought your photo was a tonalist painting, but that may be due to my eyesight. ;_).

    • ManicDdaily's avatar ManicDdaily Says:

      The photograph is very like those paintings–actually, the original more so, which was lighter, taken in the morning. I darkened it rather indiscriminately to fit the poem, since that takes place at night. I should probably put up the real picture, which turned out very nicely as you can see a bit of the sun above and not just the pinprick in the water. (I got a new camera that I have no sense of how to operate, but it still works pretty well.) k.

      On Sat, Sep 5, 2015 at 11:14 PM, ManicDDaily wrote:

      >

  2. X's avatar X Says:

    snuck out to a dance for shich it was far too young. Lol.
    I love that K.
    Was way misty/foggy on my way home really warly this morning, coming back through the mountains.

  3. Katy Magee's avatar Katy Magee Says:

    The way I read this, it had a broken sort of rhythm, which was just perfect. Love it.

  4. Kerry O'Connor's avatar Kerry O'Connor Says:

    That photo is just amazing and the poem captures the atmospheric tone perfectly.

  5. Sanaa Rizvi's avatar Sanaa Rizvi Says:

    This is absolutely lovely.. the image of night dancing is delightful!

  6. Rosemary Nissen-Wade's avatar Snakypoet (Rosemary Nissen-Wade) Says:

    Lovely sustained metaphor and one-sentence poem – two of my favourite things.

  7. Jamie Dedes's avatar Jamie Dedes Says:

    Wonderfully fun idea here. Well done, k.


  8. The night as a young person sneaking out for a dance is a wonderful image.. Especially, now in autumn before the night is still tender and has not yet grown cold and bitter.


  9. Love, love, love your personification of the night. I can see her sneaking around, wanting to dim her brilliance from grownup eyes, but still shining like only she can.

    Wonderful!


  10. “the night both pale and flushed” I can see that. This poem gives me a beautiful mental picture.

  11. kaykuala's avatar kaykuala Says:

    for which it was far
    too young, shoulders swathed
    in a stole borrowed
    without the owner’s knowledge

    Reminds Hank of such episodes of ‘borrowing’ (sometimes w/out permission at the outset) of instances when growing up. It could be from friends or siblings. Thanks for the memories K!

    Hank

  12. Mama Zen's avatar Mama Zen Says:

    This sounds so beautiful read aloud! Love this, K.

  13. lolamouse's avatar lolamouse Says:

    I was thinking as I read this, that it would fit perfectly in with the Tonal prompt! A lovely read!

  14. M's avatar M Says:

    I love this too, k, for all the reasons already pointed out ~

  15. Yvonne's avatar Yvonne Says:

    I always love what you write. It’s nice to be back in a 55-swing. Which reminds me of our G-Man. I like shoulders swathed in a borrowed stole.

  16. Othermary's avatar othermary Says:

    What a lovely image you paint with your words.


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