Bear

20110823-113955.jpg

Bear

We were like two bears in the forest, destined
never to meet, only we did meet
and we weren’t furry or fat–
well, maybe a little love-handled,
except that we hadn’t been love-handled
so that when you touched me–you do have pale soft
hairs on the tops of your fingers–I shivered–
just like one of those bears stepping out
from under a waterfall or ducking down
to catch a fish, droplets arcing in finned
sparkle around my head–instead, we stood
in an abandoned hall, wooden closets
built into the walls, and only my nostrils moved, flaring a bit
with the dust; your hands as warm as a bear’s
certainly, only his would be pawed, and I
don’t know if bears put paws around each other
when they come out in early Spring, but when we met
in that wood hall, we barely paused in what was
warm, moist, musked, emergent
if you know what I mean–as if we’d each been stuck
in some dim den, as if we’d each
been hibernating, only we’d been awake
in our dens, lying so
unbearably alone and
sleepless.

Until, that is, we met,
like two bared, destined,
in a forest—wait, did I get
that right?

Yes.

***************************

A blogging buddy cheered me up the other night by sending me a list of some very silly analogies written by High School students.  That thought let me to this poem which I am posting for the With Real Toads prompt by Susan re writing with an extended simile.  I am not sure that this qualifies but it was fun.  

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25 Comments on “Bear”

  1. Mama Zen Says:

    Sexy, sweet, and, yes, fun!

  2. Helen Dehner Says:

    I give this a resounding ROOOOAAAAARRRRR!

  3. Kay Davies Says:

    Oh, yes, definitely fun!
    K

  4. Susan Says:

    How good to “see” you, K! Your Bear/s so cleverly together so that they flash in the Dark: human/bear/human/bear. The extended simile mixes it up delightfully. I especially love the first 8 lines–well all of it! This is my new favorite of yours.


  5. I love everything about this poem – the tone, the analogy, the word play and the scene you set leaves me with a sense of longing for a bear hug.

    … maybe a little love-handled,
    except that we hadn’t been love-handled
    so that when you touched me–you do have pale soft
    hairs on the tops of your fingers–I shivered–

  6. brian miller Says:

    ha…this was fun….love handled….smiles….funny was just talking about bears with my boys the other day…have had a few close calls with bears…bared…i can tell you had fun all the way through this k…very creative piece…

  7. wolfsrosebud Says:

    what a scene you’ve given us… love the small motion of the nostrils flaring

  8. David King Says:

    Oh, I’m sure they put paws around each other… and your poem confirms me in that belief. Cuddly fun – my style of things these days!

  9. hedgewitch Says:

    A very effective simile–though I confess I have a very hard time telling simile from metaphor…whichever this is, I feel I have been a bear myself now in some former/remembered life, and the winter wait for touch and sun (and perhaps some fresh fish) seems very intimate and personal.I love the ‘finned sparkle’–lovely image of leaping silver there, and the whole suspended feel of dusty air in wooden closets, of dry, airless separation ending in warmth and life. Great stuff, k.

    • ManicDdaily Says:

      Thanks. I was inspired by all those high school students! I always thought simile was when you said “like” but everyone says that all the time now. k.

    • ManicDdaily Says:

      I changed “tongued” to “musked,” which you may appreciate – speaking of words that one can’t remember –all night I was trying to think of it and couldn’t come up with anything, even searching for it. I did find out that there is a huge market in selling bear “scents.” k.

      • hedgewitch Says:

        Crazy–I like bears, but I don;t exactly want to smell like one. UI like the alliteration in musked in that phrase, too.

        Hope you have not been chained to your desk overnight or anything. ;_)

      • ManicDdaily Says:

        Yes, I have been pretty much the last few days. A little light at the end of the tunnel, but tired. Thanks. k.


  10. The bear/bare wordplay effectively caps off this image filled comparative love story.
    http://www.kimnelsonwrites.com/2013/03/20/as-a-river-flowing/

  11. Jamie Dedes Says:

    It is fun. I love the “well maybe a little love-handled” … Chuckle.

  12. janehewey Says:

    innocent and fresh. much like high school students…
    I enjoy your images throughout, especially waterfall, arcing droplets, sparkle fin, and my fave when you talk of the pale hairs on his hands and paws around each other. really marvelous.

  13. ellaedge Says:

    growing goodness in these words! Amazing…I love your poem..one of my favs, so far ;D


  14. fabulous word play! My husband ex used to call me Bear~ but never could connect it to me since I’m thin, petite and non-hairy but you’ve opened a whole new panorama !

  15. Sabio Lantz Says:

    cute, a bear love story. nicely done


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