“Can’t Resist Myself” – Unreliable Narrator/Good Old Etch-a-Sketch

Can’t Resist Myself

I’ll lower all taxes zippity doodah-
but it will be oh so reveney neutrah–
(and I sure know about revenue hoohah
‘Cause I was once a leveraged poobah.)

Close them loopholes fee-fum-fo–
But not a hole that you might know.
(If you deduce which deductions go
It won’t be cause I told you so!)

Now listen up good, while I get this right–
I will not change a thing you like!
(Least not while talking in this mike.)
(Least not in the middle of this fight.)

Leader leader zing zing zing!
Let my etch-a-sketch ring ring ring!
(Shake – is that how you work this thing?)
(Okay, got it, bingity bing.)

I am posting this for the With Real Toads challenge to write a poem in the voice of an “unreliable narrator.”  To be read in the rhythms of Vachel Lindsay.

(Sorry, couldn’t resist.)

P.S. I appreciate that it may be a bit cryptic for those reading outside the U.S.  Again, apologies.

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20 Comments on ““Can’t Resist Myself” – Unreliable Narrator/Good Old Etch-a-Sketch”

  1. Despite my being outside the US, I fully enjoyed your satirical take eon this challenge. i just loved the mono-rhyme, the use of familiar jingle-like phrases, and your message was certainly not lost on this reader. I think this is brilliant.

  2. Susan Says:

    Ha Ha! I love the rhyme, the sense, the satire–I think this is a major achievement. When it stops reminding folks of this campaign, there will be another and another. You could write for the Doonesbury Comic Strip! Bravo!

  3. hedgewitch Says:

    Ha!!! Loving ‘leveraged poobah.’ This is so true it hurts, but that’s okay because the accompanying laughter is as always, best medicine. I need all the humor I can get with this election.

  4. Margaret Says:

    … Well, I feel one candidate’s brain is as “blank” as an empty etch a sketch. If the words are not in front of him, he is lost. Yes, it will be an interesting election, with a lot of emotion, I am sure. Can’t say I liked the content of your poem as it (I think) is directed at the candidate I like. 🙂

    • ManicDdaily Says:

      Hi Margaret, I so appreciate your reading and commenting, despite any disagreement. I am very aware that people’s political perspectives are very complex, their lenses formed by a variety of forces that really affects how they see issues. In my case, I was indelibly stamped by being raised by a mother who had been intensely affected by the Great Depression and World War II (and whose family viewed FDR as a saint). Also, I’ve been, I know, very affected by growing up in DC and then living in New York City for many many years, including 2001. I’m know that lots of other people have very different formative experiences that truly do shape how they see and hear things and view candidates! All pretty crazy and complex. I really do appreciate your taking it in good humor, and reading and commenting. k.

      • Margaret Says:

        Oh, I hope you didn’t take my reply as harsh. I actually chuckled (then groaned) after reading it 🙂 I loved visiting DC and NYC and I’m sure a few of my children will end up there. I found most people really quite friendly. I love the arts and hang out at the theatre… I’ve HAD to learn to not be offended by differing ideas. I suppose it has been interesting for them to befriend me despite my political views 🙂

      • ManicDdaily Says:

        Thanks. I know how that is! k.

  5. LOVE this! This is so clever. Read it with a big smile on my face.

  6. brian miller Says:

    haha…that is a riot….there will be no new taxes…we’ll just take your deductions….err…it is pretty funny how the story changes as well depending on where you are…or if it is the staff cleaning up ‘what he really meant’

  7. PJF Sayers Says:

    Karin, this is friggin’ hilarious! Can I say that here? People have very short memory spans when it comes to being insulted, don’t they? Flipping and a flopping seems to please some of the folk. Thanks for the satire, you go girl …


  8. janehewey Says:

    i love your light-hearted zingyness!

  9. Hey, you know me, I LOOOOOVED this piece, ha ha. The Etch-a-Sketch is perfect, the slight profile. Also, every word of it is true. He couldn’t change positions any more if he was a weather vane. Or is that ‘vein,’ seeing as he dyes his hair black and leaves the grey intact: God help us if this fool is elected. (I know, don’t hold back, Amy – tell us how you really feel!!) Peace, Amy

  10. jinksy Says:

    I think you’ve written more than will meet my English eyes! But methinks it’s very clever, nonetheless! LOL

  11. This was fun!!! Moves right along and I love the fun words you use too!

  12. Lindy Lee Says:

    Musical poetry by Etch-a-Sketch…

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