Audibly Swimming in Summer
Odilon Redon, “Ophelia”
So I thought it was too hot today to write a new poem, even for the lovely prompt above posted by Tess Kincaid of MagPie Tales and that I would re-post an older poem with (ta-da!) my first internet audio recording. Needless to say, the recording has required far more time (and maybe even heat) then expected, and is still very much in the trial and error phase.
But , if you’ve got a moment on this hot day – give it a listen. (It’s a bit slow at the beginning but speeds up very quickly.) More importantly, it illustrates punctuation at work! (As a tool against line and stanza breaks.) To listen, just click.
“Swimming in Summer” (Karin Gustafson)
Swimming in Summer
Our palms grew pale as paws in northern climes
as water soaked right through our outer skin.
In summers past, how brightly water shines,
its surface sparked by countless solar mimes,
an aurora only fragmented by limb.
Our palms grew pale as paws in northern climes
as we played hide and seek with sunken dimes,
diving beneath the waves of echoed din;
in summers past, how brightly water shines.
My mother sat at poolside with the Times’
Sunday magazine; I swam by her shin,
my palms as pale as paws in northern climes,
sculpting her ivory leg, the only signs
of life the hair strands barely there, so prim
in summers past. How brightly water shines
in that lost pool; and all that filled our minds
frozen now, the glimmer petrified within
palms, grown pale as paws in northern climes.
In summers past, how brightly water shines.
**************************************
The poem, btw, is in my book of poetry, Going on Somewhere. Check it out or also Children’s counting book 1 Mississippi -for lovers of rivers, light and pachyderms, or Nose Dive, a very fun novel that is perfect for a pool or beachside escape.
Explore posts in the same categories: poetry, Uncategorized, villanelleTags: "Swimming in Summer", audio recording of villanelle, don't stop at the line breaks!, Karin Gustafson, Magpie Tales, manicddaily, Villanelle about Swimming in Summer
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ManicDDaily 
July 1, 2012 at 3:18 pm
Amazing how incredibly alive your poem became as I listened to you read it aloud … wonderful!!
July 1, 2012 at 3:19 pm
Thanks. It is a poem that is much better read aloud because of the music of the villanelle form. It gets kind of repetitive on paper – ha, it is repetitive – but very different to the ear. k.
July 1, 2012 at 3:36 pm
I totally agree with you about punctuation – ooooh, the hours I’ve spent fiddling happily with commas…
July 1, 2012 at 3:38 pm
I cant say that I’m usually happy about my own fiddling But know what you mean! K.
July 1, 2012 at 4:29 pm
A great feeling of cycling and re-cycling through memories, each with its own aura of smiling vision until the sad feeling that the moment is remote!
July 1, 2012 at 4:31 pm
Thanks. k.
July 1, 2012 at 4:45 pm
This is my favorite:
“its surface sparked by countless solar mimes,
an aurora only fragmented by limb”
July 1, 2012 at 4:47 pm
Thanks, Shawna. k.
July 1, 2012 at 5:10 pm
I seem to remember this villanelle–and liking it a lot–the summer mood, the feel of childhood, the paws–and enjoyed the audio file as well, putting a voice with it. (I still had to read along visually, but I do get your emphatic views on punctuation a bit better now.) Your work was not in vain–turned out nicely I think, k.
July 1, 2012 at 5:13 pm
Thanks – all learning experiences. k.
July 1, 2012 at 5:23 pm
Karin G. – That is great! Brings back memories of diving for coins in the pool Lovely. Thank you for sharing the audio. Recently I have been thinking about exploring that possibility but have not quite ventured there yet. I am inspired now! Stay cool, Karin W.
July 1, 2012 at 5:25 pm
Thanks much, Karin. It is not that bad where I am in New York. I am near the Hudson so haven’t even used A/C. But I don’t mind heat. k.
July 1, 2012 at 5:33 pm
It is great fun to hear you read this. The poem sure does take on a different feel when audible. The pale palms and shining water make me incredibly happy, as if I myself had just lingered in a summer swim. very nice.
July 1, 2012 at 5:34 pm
Thanks so much, Jane. k.
July 1, 2012 at 6:48 pm
very nice…i really enjoyed your reading….and great use of repetition in this as well….i migh tplay with the pacing a bit in it when performed but def a nice one k…
July 1, 2012 at 6:53 pm
Yes – I agree re pacing. I did a few but with various apps, and I’m not sure this was best but the one that I somehow got uploaded! I was thinking of another Villanelle for the 4th which definitely would/will need a much more dramatic reading so will maybe experiment. It’s one of those poems that is far better read than on the page – the one I might try as the villanelle form can be a bit stilted on the page. We’ll see. At any rate, thanks so much, Bri. Hope you are a bit cooler now. k.
July 1, 2012 at 7:40 pm
Congrats on your reading. It’s on my short list of to-dos.
July 1, 2012 at 7:41 pm
Thank, Brenda. k.
July 2, 2012 at 10:09 am
Great to listen to your mp3 – how I wish I knew how to get one of mine on my blog! What’s the secret of your success?! 🙂
July 2, 2012 at 11:36 am
Hi Jinksy, I still haven’t totally figured it out frankly. But one key is getting a space upgrade. You need extra space on WordPress anyway, in order for it to take an mp3. I think this was actually an m4a or something like that.
Also there’s very software for recording – I don’t have a mike so used something on the iPhone. k.
July 3, 2012 at 6:48 am
I do have a pretty good quality mic, and can record to my computer easily – it’s transferring it to the blog that I can’t figure out! But as I don’t have any desire to change to WordPress, I guess I shall have to stay at the mercy of blogger!
July 3, 2012 at 6:53 am
I think blogger is about the same – maybe easier. Try soundcloud or garage band. You may need more space. I’m sure you can do it! k.
July 2, 2012 at 2:22 pm
Well written; enjoyable…
July 2, 2012 at 2:55 pm
I found it a pleasant experience indeed!
July 2, 2012 at 3:54 pm
I always enjoy this form, both writing and reading.
=)
July 3, 2012 at 5:43 pm
What a lovely treat!
July 3, 2012 at 6:04 pm
Thanks, Tess.
July 4, 2012 at 8:57 pm
Love all of this and especially “its surface sparked by countless solar mimes,”
Anna :o]