Male Ego/Coddled Egg – The Mag 112
Male Ego
Her mother used to tell her, when she was young,
about the male ego.
The girl imagined it, from her mother’s words–
fragile,delicate–as a diaphanous coddled egg
that shimmered just above
men’s foreheads.
Her mother admitted that she herself
was not good with male egos.
This, she would sometimes sigh,
was a reason she had had to work
so hard in her life.
But the girl was different from her, the mother said–
her nose was small, and she had,
what the mother called,
”little doll legs,” and, instead of a certain defensive
orneriness (the defect of the mom), she exhibited,
consistently, an intense desire to please.
The girl liked her nose well enough, but every time
her mother spoke of her little doll legs,
something cracked.
She did not really want a coddled egg hovering
over her head, and yet she would not have
minded, she thought, some edge of delicate
shimmer.
Agh! (I really have edited it some more now since first posting.)
The above is my poem (somewhat tortured and edited again since first posting) for Tess Kincaid’s The Mag (112) and also my 8th poem in eight days for the 8th day of National Poetry Month. The picture is my take on the pic by Djajakarta, posted by Tess as a prompt.
If you are interested in a comic analysis of noses, check out my very silly, but I think fun, novel called Nose Dive.
Explore posts in the same categories: poetry, UncategorizedTags: cracked egg poem, Little Doll Legs Poem, Magpie Tales, Male Ego Poem, manicddaily
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April 8, 2012 at 8:02 pm
Yum, coddled eggs! with buttered toast cut like french fries for dipping! Poem On! Happy Easter!
April 8, 2012 at 8:04 pm
Ha! I wish i had some right now. I didn’t actually have any eggs this Easter. K.
April 8, 2012 at 8:14 pm
It was going well ’til the end of line 13 — when you had to say it two ways.
The next section I’m interested in, but there seem to be filler words and technical problems because there are two “her’s/she’s,” the girl and her mother and you have to identify them. There’s a lot going on in this section, but I don’t understand it. Maybe it could use more lines
The last section is fascinating — now she would like some aspect of the male ego.
.
Seems you have brought up a subject that could be expanded a bit.
I’m very admiring that you do the hard work, day after day. And here I am, backseat driving.
Love,
Don
April 8, 2012 at 8:21 pm
Oh, Don, I’ve re-worked this repeatedly today and maybe I just got it wrong at the end. That certainly happens. I’m going to edit it right now, once more. K.
April 8, 2012 at 8:24 pm
Hi Don, Now I’ve actually cut it and tried to clarify. Agh! It’s not right! K.
April 8, 2012 at 8:24 pm
But perhaps better.
April 8, 2012 at 8:31 pm
I missed your original version, but I think the shes/hers are clear now–and I like the ‘something cracked’–there’s a lot of the old tongue in the cheek here, but some serious,too I think, about how we get programmed in our gender boxes, and then pass it on, unwillingly perhaps. I do think your vision of the male ego is drawn from life, though, at least in a few cases I’ve encountered. ;_) You are still two ahead of me, girl, with number 8! Good work.
April 8, 2012 at 8:52 pm
Really well done… I think we all have our own “little dog legs” if you know what I mean.
April 8, 2012 at 8:59 pm
I specially like:
The girl liked her nose well enough, but every time
her mother spoke of her little doll legs,
something cracked.
I think we women have a lot to do to break the stereotype.
Cheers ~
April 8, 2012 at 9:22 pm
I hope she never tries to ‘fit the mould’ too.
April 8, 2012 at 10:02 pm
what is that about the male ego…smiles….
i think this works…the realization of her own ego…esp when her mother would point out her legs and associate them with a dog…i can see the cracking there…
April 8, 2012 at 10:36 pm
Love this: “and yet she would not have
minded, she thought, some edge of delicate
shimmer”
I am also so bad about posting something and then editing it like crazy post-posting. 🙂
April 9, 2012 at 3:13 am
It looks good to me. We all go through the same things. Re-editing after posting! 😉
April 9, 2012 at 6:01 am
This is so ingenious, had I not already been a fan, I would be now.
April 9, 2012 at 10:58 am
LOVE what you did with the image! Leggo my (the male) ego was my first reaction!
April 9, 2012 at 2:17 pm
somehow frightening at times how fragile we human beings are…how much the meaning and what others say influences us…well played k.
April 9, 2012 at 10:00 pm
I think it is great maniac, you have slain the architect , and evoked something delightully doll like
April 10, 2012 at 11:34 am
Brilliant write K…a part of me connects all too well to the girl with the little doll legs…
April 10, 2012 at 11:37 am
Thanks so much, Tess. I can’t honestly look at this one for a while–it went through a bunch of permutations and still not sure what I ended up with! Some time will revisit. Thanks always for your interesting prompts. k.
April 10, 2012 at 11:57 am
I edit after posting, too. Not having seen the original version, all I can say is that this one really works for me.
=)
April 10, 2012 at 12:16 pm
Thanks so much, Sue. K.
April 10, 2012 at 10:00 pm
i don’t get it, why didn’t she want the egg over her head? 🙂
messy little girl
April 10, 2012 at 10:11 pm
Good question. You know it’s hard to keep things short enough! I think she thought that the egg represented a certain bloated fragility. (Maybe.) k.
April 10, 2012 at 11:15 pm
I believe this…there is something that cracks every now and again. Sometimes we have such thin shells.
April 11, 2012 at 2:05 pm
I like that you followed your nose for this Mag!
April 12, 2012 at 8:53 pm
What a natural pairing, male ego and coddled egg. 😉
April 14, 2012 at 3:42 pm
Wonderful take. Male ego=coddled egg. Oh, yes…
The girl liked her nose well enough, but every time
her mother spoke of her little doll legs,
something cracked.
Why do mothers always do that (I include myself)?
Thank you.