“On Commuter” (The Rubaiyat, It Is Not!)
On Commuter
The leaf buds veil, like a thin chemise,
a window of near naked trees
while the train I ride both clacks and squeaks
as I think of ways to earn my fees.
It’s not that I am truly venal
(though these urges aren’t exactly vernal)–
it’s just that I must make my keep
with day job–no, make that diurnal.
Of course, I’d rather live by rhyming.
My vocab’s good and so’s my timing.
But, alas most poets don’t get paid;
must spend their lives in nickel-diming.
So, here I stew and here I scheme,
as brain wheels spin and train wheels scream,
while just outside Spring springs pristine,
its force consumed in purer green.
Ha! Here’s my poem for the fifth day of National Poetry Month and also for dVerse Poet Pub’s “Form for All” challenge, hosted by Sam Peralta, a/k/a Semaphore. (The form is a Rubiyat Quatrain.) I am also linking this post to the Purple Treehouse.
Happy Holidays All!
AND PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE, IF YOU ARE IN THE MOOD FOR FUN, CHECK OUT “NOSE DIVE,” my very silly comic novel, only 99 cents on Kindle and about ten times that in print!
Explore posts in the same categories: poetry, UncategorizedTags: having to making money from your day job, manicddaily, no money in poetry, poet's dilemma, Rubaiyat Quatrain
You can comment below, or link to this permanent URL from your own site.
ManicDDaily 
April 5, 2012 at 9:16 pm
this is so good. gives a good sense of the subway and also about you as a poet. i really like this.
care for those age’d until the end
April 5, 2012 at 9:23 pm
Thanks so much. This one actually on an overground train, but I am a big writer on the subway! K.
April 5, 2012 at 9:30 pm
ha very nice….first i love the train…second i only wish i could get paid to write…ha….and i love to write on the train or bus…i wrote one that was silly as well…sent it to claudia but think i will write another…it was about dinner at your place…haha.
April 5, 2012 at 9:37 pm
Oh dear! Well, I hope that the food comes off well! You are very prolific. It is an odd form. K.
April 5, 2012 at 9:38 pm
Very witty! The rubaiyat scheme underlines the humor of it all, and as a poet who has a day job to make ends meet, I can definitely put myself in your shoes. Excellent work!
April 5, 2012 at 9:38 pm
Thanks, Sam.
April 5, 2012 at 9:49 pm
You make me smile! Happy holidays to you, too.
http://lkkolp.wordpress.com/2012/04/06/longing-for-you/
April 5, 2012 at 9:55 pm
“My vocab’s good and so’s my timing.
But, alas most poets don’t get paid
and spend their lives in nickel-diming.”
Too funny. 🙂
April 5, 2012 at 10:27 pm
So sad but so true–but at least once you get those nickels and dimes in the paid dues column, you can babble at will and not need to get paid. This is a nice rhyme job, and the pace is very trainlike, with that pocketa pocketa thing,(meter maybe?) rhythmic and fast flowing. I liked the first two lines, especially.
April 5, 2012 at 11:04 pm
Good for you scheme and make it happen for you.
April 6, 2012 at 1:19 am
Thoroughly enjoyed this, and could certainly relate.
April 6, 2012 at 3:26 am
ha nice…i hear that train shrieks in my ears…and we’ve already talked about it when we met…but i’m just glad i don’t have to earn my money with writing…so it’s less pressure…but i surely love to write in trains and trams and cars and planes…just in everything that moves..smiles
April 6, 2012 at 5:05 am
No, it’s classic Manicddaily, preferable to The Rubaiyat any day! For me, this is brilliant, I thoroughly enjoyed the read.
April 6, 2012 at 7:24 am
I can relate to your train rides …though I am not good in rhyming words, I am lucky I can just write for the sheer love of it.
My share: http://everydayamazin.blogspot.ca/2012/04/planting-rice.html
April 6, 2012 at 7:38 am
applauding… nice capture of the mind of a poet
April 6, 2012 at 10:08 am
Manic, those look like AABA quatrains to me! And the subject is one I’m well familiar with. Well done.
April 6, 2012 at 10:17 am
Ha! Thanks! K.
April 6, 2012 at 11:12 am
This is really good, your poem reminded me of those trains (metro north) that I also rode.R
April 6, 2012 at 11:20 am
Yes, it is metro north. I am normally on NYC subway, but this was metro north. K.
April 6, 2012 at 11:34 am
Smiling !!
April 6, 2012 at 1:27 pm
I write while on trains as well. Humorous feel and tone
April 6, 2012 at 6:20 pm
Made me nostalgic for vehicles to carry me – wishing I could watch passengers or write. For me it’s driving the long and open road which yesterday was orgasmic-ly beautiful. This was so well written and such a good use of the form. I really enjoyed it.
April 6, 2012 at 6:23 pm
Thanks so much. Lately, I have to be in cars a bit more. I am so unused to it, and have to say find it very hard. Even when pretty! No, I’m definitely at train person. (if not WELL-trained!)
April 6, 2012 at 7:12 pm
Excellent use of the form. You captured the rhythm of the train wheels and clatter.Very very impressed with that.It’s the train ride that gives you the inspiration for your work .If you were paid.. do you think your work would be this good? The best modern poetry I have ever read (I have read a lot) is from unknowns on blogs..
April 6, 2012 at 7:14 pm
Ha! Good point! Thanks, k.
April 6, 2012 at 11:36 pm
Searching for ways to deal with reality is always the work of poetry. It’s good to see your work getting done in this use of the form.