dVerse Poetics-Marlowe Revisited – Christopher not Phillip
The wonderful and very supportive dVerse Poets Pub suggests as a poetics prompt today that one imitate an admired poet. As host to the prompt, Victoria gives a great personalized version of the wonderful Wallace Stevens Thirteen Ways of Looking At A Blackbird. I would love to try my hand at Wallace Stevens, but shortness of time and several days into the long distance part of a long-distance relationship lead me instead to Christopher Marlowe, a poet whom I love and whose work I’ve already imitated. This is based on the wonderful “The Passionate Shepherd to His Love”. (“Come live with me and be my love.”)
A Passionate Long-Distance Caller To Her Love
Come live with me, my sweet, my dear,
and we shall never echoes hear
of anxious longing, fearful cries,
of ‘why me?‘ woes or angry lies–
our ears won’t burn with cellphone’s ray,
our brains won’t morph their matters gray
into tumors fed by conversations
that only serve to try our patience.
Oh please come here; stay right by me
so I can see you when I see
the sky, the window, the chair, the bed.
the pillow there beside my head,
for you are all to me and more,
my sun, my moon, my ceiling, floor,
the one I talk to, the one
for whom I’d be still–sweet Hon,
I know my silence is not much known–
I can’t quite manage it on the phone–
but come here soon and stay forever
and we’ll lay quietly together.
(Apologies to those who’ve read this poem before; it is edited a bit! I will try some Wallace Stevens soon.)
Explore posts in the same categories: poetryTags: Come Live With Me and Be My Love imitated, drawing of woman on phone, dVerse Poets Pub, imitation of Christopher Marlowe, manicddaily, ManicDDaily poetry, poetry for long distance relationship
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ManicDDaily 
October 13, 2011 at 3:10 pm
nice…definitely feel the endearing in these lines…well played against marlowe…ha fun with the cell phones causing cancer but i believe that is not why you want them by your side…smiles.
October 13, 2011 at 3:52 pm
I love that you brought Christopher to life here in the 21st Century.
L-7 felt like it had one extra syllable. I’m not a meter-goddess, but would the stress work better if, instead of into, you just used to? Hopefully someone who is more skilled at scansion than I will comment.
And the line beginning with “The one I talk to…” feels like it needs an extra syllable.
I confess to feeling inept in this kind of critique, though. :0)
October 13, 2011 at 4:10 pm
No, thanks so much. I will review it. One gets their own way of reading which may force a certain rhythm that is not there. Thanks.
October 13, 2011 at 4:24 pm
Gorgeous expression of emotion. Regarding the comment above, L7 feels off because of two stresses side by side
inTO| TUmors | FED by| CONver | SAtions
Truly enjoyed.
October 13, 2011 at 4:27 pm
Thanks. I will look at this. I actually just changed that line in revising just before posting and probably got it wrong! Thanks for your close attention.
October 13, 2011 at 5:40 pm
I enjoyed this poem greatly. You do Marlowe style well. My favorite lines are:
I know my silence is not much known–
I can’t quite manage it on the phone–
but come here soon and stay forever
and we’ll lay quietly together.
Lovely wish!
October 13, 2011 at 5:42 pm
Moving with a wonderful flow; I love that you bring it into the now. I was so caught up I didn’t notice the rhyme, well done.
October 13, 2011 at 7:29 pm
I too appreciate how you brought that Marlowe language up to date. I can feel those last few lines; I always hated talking on the phone.
October 13, 2011 at 9:44 pm
Definitely romantic……. I wasn’t familiar with Marlowe until just now when I followed your link…. he was very visual about his immediate surroundings and I think you copied that very well with the sky, the window, the chair, the bed, the pillow beside my head”….. very believable and visual…… good job….
October 13, 2011 at 9:45 pm
Thanks, John. He (Marlowe) was probably better known as a playwight, writing “Dr. Faustus.” Died super young in tavern brawl, stabbed in the eye.
October 15, 2011 at 12:11 am
ooooooooooohhhhhhhh…… ouch. A stabbing? There but for the grace of God go “eye…” Literally, it could have been me, I suppose…. Definite cause to count blessings…..
October 13, 2011 at 10:53 pm
You based this on one of my favorite poems, and you did a spectacular job. I absolutely adore this!
October 13, 2011 at 10:57 pm
Thanks so much.
October 13, 2011 at 11:10 pm
This is very lovely– you’ve made Marlowe’s cadence and structure your very own. Tantalizing imagery as well–
and we shall never echoes hear
of anxious longing, fearful cries,
of ‘why me?‘ woes or angry lies–
our ears won’t burn with cellphone’s ray,
our brains won’t morph their matters gray
into tumors fed by conversations
that only serve to try our patience.
Brava! Re my punctuation in the Rilke ‘variation’– some questions seem best to me conveyed as statements– but yes, long lines, long questions, few answers! xxxj
October 14, 2011 at 7:34 am
Thanks, Jenne.
October 13, 2011 at 11:22 pm
long distance love is not easy to manage…the longing for the lover…felt in your lines..never heard about Christopher Marlowe but def. need to check him out
October 14, 2011 at 7:34 am
Thanks, Claudia! He is probably better known as playwright. Did English version of Dr. Faustus, around Shakespeare’s time.
October 14, 2011 at 7:47 am
It wasn’t Wally or Chris who first came to mind but Robert Plant, singing “The Song Remains the Same” … But only for a moment as then the Marlowe mansion opened up. You’ve got that boy down pat — the Elizabethan metrics are spot-on — and the wild ache of unrequieted love (one of the oldest saws in the literature) echoes perfectly here through a cellphone (where before it might have been a Dixie cup on a string, or a shell). To be so close yet so far far away never will do. Fine poem – Brendan
October 14, 2011 at 8:04 am
Thanks so much, Brendan.
October 14, 2011 at 10:53 am
Ha Ha. this is Marlowe, for sure.
great job in mimicry here, put to the 21st century stage.
good rhyming and rhythm and a tale to the tone
of a Love which leads to the bed and not phone.
good job here.
thanks for sharing.
October 15, 2011 at 8:14 am
quite inviting words, well done.