dVerse Poetics-Marlowe Revisited – Christopher not Phillip

The wonderful and very supportive dVerse Poets Pub  suggests as a poetics prompt today that one imitate an admired poet.  As host to the prompt, Victoria gives a great personalized version of the wonderful Wallace Stevens Thirteen Ways of Looking At A Blackbird.  I would love to try my hand at Wallace Stevens, but shortness of time  and several days into the long distance part of a long-distance relationship lead me instead to Christopher Marlowe, a poet  whom I  love and whose work I’ve already imitated.   This is based on the wonderful  “The Passionate Shepherd to His Love”. (“Come live with me and be my love.”)

A Passionate Long-Distance Caller To Her Love

Come live with me, my sweet, my dear,
and we shall never echoes hear
of anxious longing, fearful cries,
of ‘why me?‘ woes or angry lies–
our ears won’t burn with cellphone’s ray,
our brains won’t morph their matters gray
into tumors fed by conversations
that only serve to try our patience.
Oh please come here; stay right by me
so I can see you when I see
the sky, the window, the chair, the bed.
the pillow there beside my head,
for you are all to me and more,
my sun, my moon, my ceiling, floor,
the one I talk to, the one
for whom I’d be still–sweet Hon,
I know my silence is not much known–
I can’t quite manage it on the phone–
but come here soon and stay forever
and we’ll lay quietly together.

 

 

(Apologies to those who’ve read this poem before; it is edited a bit!  I will try some Wallace Stevens soon.)

Explore posts in the same categories: poetry

Tags: , , , , , ,

You can comment below, or link to this permanent URL from your own site.

21 Comments on “dVerse Poetics-Marlowe Revisited – Christopher not Phillip”

  1. brian miller's avatar brian miller Says:

    nice…definitely feel the endearing in these lines…well played against marlowe…ha fun with the cell phones causing cancer but i believe that is not why you want them by your side…smiles.


  2. I love that you brought Christopher to life here in the 21st Century.
    L-7 felt like it had one extra syllable. I’m not a meter-goddess, but would the stress work better if, instead of into, you just used to? Hopefully someone who is more skilled at scansion than I will comment.

    And the line beginning with “The one I talk to…” feels like it needs an extra syllable.

    I confess to feeling inept in this kind of critique, though. :0)

    • ManicDdaily's avatar manicddaily Says:

      No, thanks so much. I will review it. One gets their own way of reading which may force a certain rhythm that is not there. Thanks.

  3. Beth's avatar Beth Says:

    Gorgeous expression of emotion. Regarding the comment above, L7 feels off because of two stresses side by side

    inTO| TUmors | FED by| CONver | SAtions

    Truly enjoyed.

    • ManicDdaily's avatar manicddaily Says:

      Thanks. I will look at this. I actually just changed that line in revising just before posting and probably got it wrong! Thanks for your close attention.

  4. Mary's avatar Mary Says:

    I enjoyed this poem greatly. You do Marlowe style well. My favorite lines are:

    I know my silence is not much known–
    I can’t quite manage it on the phone–
    but come here soon and stay forever
    and we’ll lay quietly together.

    Lovely wish!


  5. Moving with a wonderful flow; I love that you bring it into the now. I was so caught up I didn’t notice the rhyme, well done.

  6. Roebuck's avatar Mark Kerstetter Says:

    I too appreciate how you brought that Marlowe language up to date. I can feel those last few lines; I always hated talking on the phone.


  7. Definitely romantic……. I wasn’t familiar with Marlowe until just now when I followed your link…. he was very visual about his immediate surroundings and I think you copied that very well with the sky, the window, the chair, the bed, the pillow beside my head”….. very believable and visual…… good job….

    • ManicDdaily's avatar manicddaily Says:

      Thanks, John. He (Marlowe) was probably better known as a playwight, writing “Dr. Faustus.” Died super young in tavern brawl, stabbed in the eye.


      • ooooooooooohhhhhhhh…… ouch. A stabbing? There but for the grace of God go “eye…” Literally, it could have been me, I suppose…. Definite cause to count blessings…..

  8. Nick Rolynd's avatar Nick Rolynd Says:

    You based this on one of my favorite poems, and you did a spectacular job. I absolutely adore this!

  9. Jenne' R. Andrews's avatar jenneandrews Says:

    This is very lovely– you’ve made Marlowe’s cadence and structure your very own. Tantalizing imagery as well–

    and we shall never echoes hear
    of anxious longing, fearful cries,
    of ‘why me?‘ woes or angry lies–
    our ears won’t burn with cellphone’s ray,
    our brains won’t morph their matters gray
    into tumors fed by conversations
    that only serve to try our patience.

    Brava! Re my punctuation in the Rilke ‘variation’– some questions seem best to me conveyed as statements– but yes, long lines, long questions, few answers! xxxj

  10. claudia's avatar claudia Says:

    long distance love is not easy to manage…the longing for the lover…felt in your lines..never heard about Christopher Marlowe but def. need to check him out

    • ManicDdaily's avatar manicddaily Says:

      Thanks, Claudia! He is probably better known as playwright. Did English version of Dr. Faustus, around Shakespeare’s time.

  11. Brendan's avatar Brendan Says:

    It wasn’t Wally or Chris who first came to mind but Robert Plant, singing “The Song Remains the Same” … But only for a moment as then the Marlowe mansion opened up. You’ve got that boy down pat — the Elizabethan metrics are spot-on — and the wild ache of unrequieted love (one of the oldest saws in the literature) echoes perfectly here through a cellphone (where before it might have been a Dixie cup on a string, or a shell). To be so close yet so far far away never will do. Fine poem – Brendan

  12. tinkwelborn's avatar tinkwelborn Says:

    Ha Ha. this is Marlowe, for sure.
    great job in mimicry here, put to the 21st century stage.
    good rhyming and rhythm and a tale to the tone
    of a Love which leads to the bed and not phone.
    good job here.
    thanks for sharing.


  13. quite inviting words, well done.


I'd love to hear from you!

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.